We once had a neighbor in base housing who played his giant drum set at all hours in his garage with the door wide open, creating quite a racket in the adjoining houses. When asked if he could modify his hours or perhaps close said garage door, he refused and told us to feel free to call the housing office to complain if we didn't like it. (Hmm…not a stellar way to get along with your neighbors!) Another set of neighbors regularly let their giant dog do its business all over our shared yard.
There are just some people you’re glad to say goodbye to when PCS orders arrive!
On the other hand, we’ve had amazing neighbors whose children became fast friends of our own kids (and they're still in touch all these years later as young adults), friends who were there to celebrate with us when we brought our newborn babies home from the hospital, and those who checked on us regularly when my husband was deployed (as we gladly did for them as well).
If your family has also lived on base, I'm sure you have your own stories to add! Like anything, life in military housing can be a mixed bag, but if you’re in a location where military housing is the only option or it’s your first time living on base or post, here are a few do’s and don’ts our family gathered over several decades of the military life.
Military housing often means shared walls and yards, so you’ll need to be mindful of your family’s noise and of your neighbors’ privacy.
And be friendly! Simple kindnesses go a long way. Take a moment to introduce yourself when you see new neighbors moving in. But don't assume because you’re next door neighbors that you'll be best friends. Sometimes a little space can be a good thing! But then again, who knows? Maybe you DID just meet your new best friend!
Whether privatized or not, government housing has certain standards you’ll be required to maintain.
Most military housing has a “Mayberry” vibe and can feel safer than the community outside the gate, and your kids will probably have more freedom than they might otherwise. But it's important to know base curfews as well as regulations for how old children need to be before they're left alone at home, play at the park, or even walk to school without an adult.
It's good to be mindful of active duty neighbors who are working evening and night shifts and may be sleeping during the day.
Often within walking distance or within military family housing, you'll find community pools, libraries, bowling alleys, movie theaters, splash parks, gyms, and youth centers. These are just a few of the amenities that can make living on base so family-friendly!
And even if you do opt to live on base, it's still a good idea to make a point of engaging with the off-base community for a richer experience. Take time to learn more about the area, whether it’s through a community group, church, or other volunteerism.
The sounds of Taps, Reveille, the National Anthem on the "Big Voice," gunfire from the shooting range, military members calling cadence as they run past your home in formation are a few examples. (And DO stop/pull your car over during the Anthem!)
You’ll find it hard to get back onto a gated installation without it, resident or not. (Trust me on this one.)
Too many infractions and you could end up losing your base driving privileges.
It’s inconsiderate to your neighbors and dangerous for your pet. And many installations these days have dog parks, which is a safe way to let your dog off leash.
Get more info about pets in military housing:
We had to say it. It’s just not worth it! For a couple of humorous and helpful posts about this, see Are YOU the Bad Neighbor? and Annoying Neighbors? Strategies from a Seasoned Military Spouse.
So much of what creates a great neighborhood situation, whether in military housing or not, is simple consideration and respect. And remember, if you have neighbor problems that go beyond annoyance and tread into safety issues, you have recourse through the base housing office and law enforcement.
Often, insight from others can help you decide what’s best for your family’s situation.
My grown kids miss the community feel and often discuss their memories of years living in base housing. It can be an amazing experience!
What did we miss? If you’ve lived in military housing, what DO or DON’T would you add to this list?
For more information about living in base housing, take a look at What's the Future of Military Housing?